So I am writing out some life goals and outlining my plans or hopes and wishes for the coming years. I have done this loosely in the past but combining this with some vision board work and all my new ideas and all, I really feel like I can make some strides. One of the things I want to do is own a home, it's not an "American Dream" thing, although it may be, it is really about me having space. I love space, I want to host dinners, I want a garden, and not just for growing things in, although that is a must. I want to breath there, meditate and have time to be. I am also looking at being published which is odd because there is nothing that I avoid more than books, but it is something that I have in me and I will not deny it.
My newest venture in my art practice is actually focused more on facilitation than it is on art. I have always been drawn to help others. I would actually help others before I take for myself, and that is something I have been examining for a long time and want to be both at peace with it while also open to it shifting as I grow. My making of art has never been real cut and dry, I do oddball things to put me in contact with others. My Portrait Project, or my ChicagoArts interview series, for both I was driven by my desire to connect, but for both I made no money, there is a combined 22 years of creative practice that I didn't charge anyone for. Now I am moving into a facilitation practice to help people self reflect, and I am charging for that and I get to connect and make art because the facilitation work starts with a portrait. I really have to open up to how that is going to work, how it will afford me a home and peace of mind. It is new and I have been put through the ringer enough over the past few years.
All of this is to say that as part of the writing work I ma doing is spelling out what my greatest accomplishments are. It is an odd question because I don't feel like anything I have done is done. I never got a degree from a school, which could be a focal point for many, TRANSfiguration barely ever got off the ground, my Portrait Project was open ended and I continue to explore that, so that is not an "accomplishment." I used to be represented by galleries, but that all changed and now I don't even make work that is intended for showing. The interview series or Our Cultural Center were things I did as well but they both kind of ended without being resolved in a way I was happy with. Everything, for me, has been a lesson, one learning experience after another. There is no accomplishment.
I could laundry list what I have done, because I have done a lot, and it has all been fun and my life is really one giant adventure. But that doesn't change the fact that this answer eludes me. I see that it is because I do not value what I have done, not because it has no value but because it is currently not a currency within my day to day. It all has made me who I am today though, It has made me the person that is loved by so many, and seen so clearly. I really do love who I am. Sure I have a long way to go, I still hold shame and desire, two things I want to get under control, but for the most part I am a great person. I don't know anyone who I would rather be. There are things I want to have more of in my life but I can get those things. The important part to all this is that I am happy with who I am and able to be who I am everywhere I am, this comes from inside myself.
I am privileged to be able to be me, and I recognize that. I do not know how I became to be me but here I am and I am extremely grateful for that. So I guess it turns out that my greatest accomplishment is me. Now, although that is great, try putting that on a resume lol.
Showing posts with label artist. Show all posts
Showing posts with label artist. Show all posts
Tuesday, August 30, 2016
Friday, July 8, 2016
Portrait Counseling : See Yourself and Love Yourself (some initial thoughts)
Portrait Counseling starts by accepting the ancient idea that we are all connected, that we are all one. Whether that be through a god, the quantum unified field, cosmic consciousness or any other of the myriad way we have discussed all being connected. Accepting that we all harness that which is in everything, allows the patient and counselor to immerse themselves into the sub-conscience, connecting them to that which is all of us.
In Portrait Counseling, like in traditional cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), there is fluid discussion to find repeating patterns of thought that may be in conflict with the desired goals of the client. Portrait Counselling is unique to traditional CBT in that it adds the portrait process to the initial session. Portraiture allows the counselor to focus on the the client while discussing issues or diverging thoughts. This process wholly entangles the artist and the person who they are rendering. During this process there is information shared and the focus and intuitive concentration of the counselor it spelled out within the portrait. During this initial 2 hour session the conversation may ebb and flow over a variety of topics, the whole time bringing the client and counselor closer, understanding and sharing through the intimacy of entanglement.
The counselor, or artist, then trusts that connection allowing them to create during the session. As the discussion flows and the patient shares the counselor allows intuition and spirit to guide them. Although written notes may be taken, the portrait is the primary record of the session. Upon completion of the portrait and the session there is a dialogue about what was create and what ideas get stirred by the portrait. The patient is encouraged to reflect on the portrait over the following days taking notes as to what thoughts arise from the portrait, what may be frustrating or comforting to them. The counselor is given the same task and notes ideas that came up during the process of making the portrait. It is important to understand what information there is for the patient to glean, and what information is solely that of the artist.The relationship between the patient and counselor grows over time and it is important that these portraits not be seen as finished artworks but as bi-products of the work being done.
The goal of this type of counseling is for there to be a greater understanding of self. Trusting our path, and that we are all on a path contributing to all that is, is a great step to loving deeper. Looking at oneself is not always easy, we are critical and can see past mistakes much clearer than we can see future success. Blame is often a way to divert that which we will eventually take responsibility for, and Portrait Counseling can help ease that transition so that we can more easily stand up for what we want rather than be distracted but what we are told to want.
This processes will not open you to to anything you are already not open to. If you hold beliefs that you no longer want to hold, this process can open a path to letting go of those things you are ready to let go of. Looking at yourself is not easy especially when done from a place of entanglement with another person. When you are alone you can hide from yourself, but when you are seen there is nowhere to hide, and you will find that the instinct to allow and be yourself will overwhelm you, love will be there to hold you, and moving forward will happen when you are ready.
In Portrait Counseling, like in traditional cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), there is fluid discussion to find repeating patterns of thought that may be in conflict with the desired goals of the client. Portrait Counselling is unique to traditional CBT in that it adds the portrait process to the initial session. Portraiture allows the counselor to focus on the the client while discussing issues or diverging thoughts. This process wholly entangles the artist and the person who they are rendering. During this process there is information shared and the focus and intuitive concentration of the counselor it spelled out within the portrait. During this initial 2 hour session the conversation may ebb and flow over a variety of topics, the whole time bringing the client and counselor closer, understanding and sharing through the intimacy of entanglement.
The counselor, or artist, then trusts that connection allowing them to create during the session. As the discussion flows and the patient shares the counselor allows intuition and spirit to guide them. Although written notes may be taken, the portrait is the primary record of the session. Upon completion of the portrait and the session there is a dialogue about what was create and what ideas get stirred by the portrait. The patient is encouraged to reflect on the portrait over the following days taking notes as to what thoughts arise from the portrait, what may be frustrating or comforting to them. The counselor is given the same task and notes ideas that came up during the process of making the portrait. It is important to understand what information there is for the patient to glean, and what information is solely that of the artist.The relationship between the patient and counselor grows over time and it is important that these portraits not be seen as finished artworks but as bi-products of the work being done.
The goal of this type of counseling is for there to be a greater understanding of self. Trusting our path, and that we are all on a path contributing to all that is, is a great step to loving deeper. Looking at oneself is not always easy, we are critical and can see past mistakes much clearer than we can see future success. Blame is often a way to divert that which we will eventually take responsibility for, and Portrait Counseling can help ease that transition so that we can more easily stand up for what we want rather than be distracted but what we are told to want.
This processes will not open you to to anything you are already not open to. If you hold beliefs that you no longer want to hold, this process can open a path to letting go of those things you are ready to let go of. Looking at yourself is not easy especially when done from a place of entanglement with another person. When you are alone you can hide from yourself, but when you are seen there is nowhere to hide, and you will find that the instinct to allow and be yourself will overwhelm you, love will be there to hold you, and moving forward will happen when you are ready.
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